so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I miss vodka workout Fridays
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize