white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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