a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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