I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
