I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
