I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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