i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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