Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize