my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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