You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
