If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I wish life had little blips of pornography
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
