sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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