I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
