Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
