This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
