we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
