So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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