How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
this hospital has no fireball
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
