Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
