i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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