ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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