alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
