But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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