i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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