Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
