All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
