Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
