Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize