He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
