grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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