I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
