real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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