I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
