Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
