Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Randomize
