oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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