I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Randomize
