im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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