Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
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