You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
