Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
