it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
