I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
