i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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