I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
