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• (917): View more from New York City

  So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?

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• (512): View more from Texas

  He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I accepted the offer

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!

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• (315): View more from New York

  Be careful, there is sex in the air.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!

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