when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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