it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
