I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
