So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
