The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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